Sunday, February 10, 2008 --- Hey BLOGGER, have I mentioned lately that I hate your guts?

Blogger won't completely finish publishing my blog -- which means it's uploading incompletely and not updating all of my posts. I can tell that this is happening (aside from the obvious of them telling me) because the 02/2008 archive page gets published first and on it I have 2 comments for the previous post -- but on my main index page, it says I have 1 comment. Put it this way, Blogger is very unkind to FTP-uploading bloggers who made their own templates. I am getting so fed up with this crap that I am seriously thinking about creating a Wordpress blog -- except the amount of work involved with migrating and template modifications, well, quite simply, the thought makes me ill.

FOR THOSE WHO EXPERIENCED DIFFICULTY LISTENING TO THE SONG FROM MY PREVIOUS -- YOU CAN HEAR IT HERE: http://www.vanessaleehamlen.com/blog/joan/

[It seems as though the closing embed tag keeps getting dropped when publishing -- which makes the song player not want to work in Mozilla -- probably cock-sucking-Blogger's fault...What else is new?]

So I ask ask you all...How easy is it set things up to publish with Wordpress instead of Blogger? I want to publish to my own hosted domain and I want to use my own template. And, unlike Blogger, I don't think that the entire blog needs to be republished every time I post a new post -- because the bigger the blog gets...you get the idea. How does publishing with Wordpress work/differ?

The comments are open!

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Wednesday, November 7, 2007 --- Diane Keaton makes me positively nuts...How about you?

Diane Keaton has really been getting under my skin lately. Well, maybe it's been longer than just lately. I think this has been going on for some time now, but I just can't put my finger on exactly when it started. Let's say...it has been off and on for about two years? Maybe.


Anyway, you might be wondering, "How does Diane Keaton make the Butterfly crazy?"

I could say it has something to do with her need to make every character she portrays on film gesticulate like a psychotic mime addicted to amphetamines. It seriously makes me want to grab her god damned flailing arms and strap them to her sides with duct tape...But no, that's only part of it.


I could also mention the positively shrill and hysterical quality that her voice takes on whenever one of her characters is having some sort of neurotic breakdown. Because I mean, really, can you think of any part she has played over the years that did not incorporate this performance?? I honestly think that she is not playing parts anymore, but rather making extended-cameo appearances in films as herself. Except, it's more than that...


I could talk about her perpetually bad posture and how she sort of slouches while jutting her hips forward in a most irritating way...Is this her body's idea of an endearing pout for the spine? It's not sexy, stop it, stop it right now! My former ballet teacher, Ms. D'Aubray Goncharoff would be appalled and promptly throw Diane out of her class if she saw this crap.


I may point out -- what I strongly suspect might actually be written into her contract -- a stipulation that all of her costumes are to involve numerous clothing layers above the waist, ridiculously voluminous skirts and a copious helping of scarves. She looks so bundled and uptight that it makes me constipated to look at her on screen. And, this wardrobe issue brings me agonizingly close to the one thing that makes me most insane about Diane Keaton...

Have you ever noticed that this woman has a serious, serious, SERIOUS addiction to belts? Not just belts, but belts so wide that they'd almost be suitable for use during weightlifting? Diane, dear, you need help. Step away from the belts!


For example, I was watching Because I Said So tonight on cable. On a whim, I decided to count how many times she wore an insane belt. [You can try this same game yourself with any of her movies, like a fashion drinking game!] And, I am positively alarmed to report that she was wearing a belt wider than 2 inches (more like 3-4 inches!) count 'em -- on NINETEEN separate occasions, with the exception of ONE time where she had a belt that was approximately 1 1/2 inches wide, and another scene in which she was wearing her belted bathrobe (which may or may not count, technically) -- all in the same film! That's TWENTY-ONE extremely-belted moments. Jesus Christ. I think she was wearing no belt in perhaps five (?) scenes...not much more than that, I assure you.


Boy, let me tell you, Diane can work a belt into ANY situation. She can NOT do Formal Wear without a menacing belt (as seen in the first two pictures above.) She will do it over a thick series of shirt layers (third picture)...she will do it over blazers and coats (fifth picture which is actually a real life occurrence - but you can just as easily see the same thing in Because I Said So too!)...And last, but not least, her crowning achievement? At left, incorporating a huge belt into a wedding gown -- which by the way, also makes use of the bundled-buttoned-shirt-with-scarf motif!


Listen lady, I'm all for a signature style. But, fuck. Change it up once in a while, will ya? The Annie-Hall-thing had to be phased out of all women's wardrobes at some point, now you need to phase out this "crazy Diane" business, too. Really. It's time.


[ Photo credits: Picture #1, Picture #2, Picture #3, Picture #4, Picture #5, Picture #6 ]

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Monday, June 25, 2007 --- Oh, those funny GFY girls!

butterfly has sent you a clip...

butterfly's Message:
Clipmarked this lol goody...Amy Winehouse makes me nervous. I expect her to be smelly and possibly have pests in that hairdo!

I think the girls over at www.gofugyourself.com will back me up on this -- which is where I clipped this from. Ugh!

Get Clipmarks - The easiest way to email text, images and videos you find on the web. It's free!
Sent with Clipmarks

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Monday, June 11, 2007 --- We're mad as hell...and we're not going to take it anymore!

And now...

ESPN's AFRICAN SAFARI GAMES' SCOREBOARD:

0 - LIONS
0 - CROCODILES

1 - WATER BUFFALOES


The crowd goes crazy!!! WATER BUFFALOES SCOOOOOOOOORRRRRE!!!


In your ASS, LIONS!!

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Saturday, April 28, 2007 --- Another visit to the range...

We took the Lizzard to the range and taught her how to shoot. She did great!!! You can take a look at her targets on her blog...

Here are the targets from my second visit to the range:



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Friday, April 13, 2007 --- Pretty good for my first time out!

Went to a firing range recently --- and tried out shooting a 9mm pistol --- a Walther P88 to be exact. Here is my first target...I would say I did a damn good job, in spite of the powerful recoil and my nervousness!!!


That wide hole is from two separate bullets that I shot in the same spot! The shot directly in the center of the "10" I must confess, was not me --- that was the boyfriend testing the sights. But, considering this was my first time, I sure did get a lot in the center area! I also got a terrible headache from all the noise, even with my ear protection...SOOOO LOOOOOUUUUUD! Although, not as loud as the .357 Magnum that the boyfriend was trying out --- a veritable hand-cannon! Yikes. It was nice to leave the guns and noise behind.

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www.vanessaleehamlen.com - THE BUTTERFLY BLOG - Copyright ©2007 Vanessa Lee Hamlen. All rights reserved.

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I am a graphic designer. I love animals and have quite a few pets. There is a frustrated DJ inside of me --- hence, my ongoing obsession with making music mixes.

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-- Music from Butterfly's personal library --

LORI'S LABOR: A collection of 6 unique playlists with varying intensity and mood for your listening pleasure! I created these original mixes for my friends to use during the labor and delivery of their first baby, Nicholas.

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Listen to my comical, purposefully nasal, total HAM-job submission to the 2007 Blogger Christmahanukwanzaakah Online Holiday Concert in the mini-player above!
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